LEAPING OFF THE CLIFF.
I was just a silly, naive kid. I didn't know any better. It was the mid-90's and the Independent Film movement had begun. I was hooked. With inspiration from like-minded lunatics such as Quenton Tarrantino and Robert Rodriguez, I found myself neck-deep in writing, producing, and directing my very first film: MY SWEET SUICIDE. Then I mortgaged my home to pay for it.
If you know anything about independent filmmaking, taking a mortgage out on on your house is considered Mistake #1. But since I was blind to it, and making a million mistakes all along the way, it never occurred to me that maybe, just maybe I didn't know what I was doing. I had seasoned professionals laugh at me behind my back. I had well-meaning advocates advise me to wait. But, I was out-of-my-mind-crazy with the idea of bringing my film to life and seeing it on the big screen. Nothing, not even common sense, was going to get in my way.
So, I did it. The journey was so frightening. So difficult. So enlightening. I didn't know how to make a feature film when I started, but I sure as hell did when it was finished. Now, is it the best movie ever made? Well, in my humble opinion, it's pretty damn good for a first film, seriously, I still laugh and cry when I watch it. But, that's the wrong question to ask. "How in the hell did you pull that rabbit out of a hat?" That's a far better and more relevant question. I learned so much along the way. About filmmaking and about myself. In a very real sense, it changed who I am. I "became" a filmmaker through the process of making a film.
Since that time, I have written over twenty feature films and become deeply involved in the movie-making world, learning more and more and more all along. I've had lunch with big-time, fat cat producers and dined with some of Hollywood's biggest stars...yet the thing I always look back on and recall with the greatest of affection...something I will never forget, or regret, is that I did something really stupid...risking my own home just so that I could make my movie, and that no matter what all the naysayers warned, I just did it.
My story is out there right now, and will be...forever.